The dating scene around here is very intimidating for various reasons. For one thing, most of us are very hesitant to put ourselves out there because we are afraid of rejection. But like I have written in the past, you can’t win if you don’t play.
My recent advice on dating — as well as the professional advice of VH1 matchmakers Steve and JoAnn Ward (Tough Love)— really resonated with a lot of you. Readers sent me some great comments and questions and I want to share one of the questions because this seems to be a common circumstance. For anonymity purposes we’ll call the person who asked the question: Studly.
He asked, “How can I approach a friend/acquaintance who I am interested in dating, but without it being awkward?”
This is a great question because many times people start out as friends and there is always that lingering thought telling you: “Don’t date your friends because it ruins relationships.” But I believe that if you have feelings for someone and you are romantically interested in that person, then you should say it.
In this circumstance, the woman that Studly is interested in had a boyfriend so he couldn’t ask her a few months ago. Now she is single, however, he fears she (we’ll call her Cutie) will reject him and then it may ruin their friendship. He could say something like, “Hey Cutie, I really enjoy our friendship and as I get to know you, I think you are a great person. I am a little embarrassed and I don’t want this to be awkward, but I have been interested in taking you out on a date for awhile but I knew you had a boyfriend so I didn’t pursue it. Now that things are different, how would you like to have dinner on Saturday?”
Obviously you could word this differently, but you get the point. I gave this advice to Studly and his rebuttal was, “Yeah, but then she could say no and then our friendship will be awkward.”
My answer to him is: you will always have that feeling of uncertainty and it will eat you up because you want to take this friendship to the next level; if you never try then it actually makes things worse for both of you in the long run.
Bottom line: If you are interested in someone then go for it. Seriously, if you always hold back then you will never know and if you can’t remain friendly then maybe you weren’t that good of friends to begin with. Go for it! Take a risk! If anything, it will be flattering to the other person.
Dating can be fun and what better way to take someone out then during Atlantic City Restaurant Week.
Atlantic City Restaurant week runs until Sunday, March 6, with 83 participating restaurants. Check out acrestaurantweek.com for more details.
Other great events, fundraisers, and classes coming up include a PBA fundraiser at Ducktown Tavern in Atlantic City starting at 6:30pm on March 10 ($20 at the door).
The ACCC Restaurant Gala is March 11 at Bally’s in Atlantic City. I go every year; it is so much fun and lots of great food. Go to atlantic.edu for more details.
Also on March 11 the Atlantic County Women’s Hall of Fame annual event will take place at the Trump Marina starting at 6pm. For more details you can visit acwhf.org. Make sure to check out the photographs of all the past inductees in the skywalk between the Atlantic City Convention Center and the Sheraton Atlantic City.
Debra Gitto, our local etiquette specialist, will be holding a class that starts on March 18 (11am-1pm) at Manna Restaurant in Margate called “Executive Dining Etiquette.” Check out her Web site for more information and other upcoming events etiquetteinfo.com.
Also keep your calendar open for March 27 when the Trump Plaza is hosting the Insulin Support Group Diabetes Telethon from 10am-10pm. They are in need of talented vocalists, instrumentalists and dancers for the show being televised live on Comcast TV and streamed on the Web. Contact Mary Moyer at firstname.lastname@example.org.
Whitney is an on-air multimedia personality, and works behind the scenes helping businesses gain extra exposure, through her WIN Promotions video production services.